April 13, 2025

Are Christians Satisfied Pt 3

Are Christians Satisfied Pt 3

Are Christians truly satisfied with Jesus alone?

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Are Christians truly satisfied with Jesus alone?

WEBVTT

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Looking at our world from a theological perspective. This is

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the Theology Central podcast, making Theology Central. Good evening everyone.

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It is Sunday, April thirteenth, twenty twenty five. It is

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currently six oh seven pm Central Time, and I'm coming

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to you live from the Theology Central studio located right

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here in Abilene, Texas. Now, at one point in my

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military career, six seven pm on a Sunday evening would

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mean I had been at work for about seven minutes

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because I had walked into the building and started my shift.

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At six pm, I walked into Earling Birkwist Regional Hospital

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to begin my Sunday evening shift. Because the way it

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worked is one weekend I would have off. The next

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weekend I would work Friday, Saturday and Sunday, and I

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work twelve hour shifts. It was this three on two off,

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this kind of weird. I don't remember the exact way

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it worked out, but the simple way is one weekend

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I was off, and the next weekend I worked Friday, Saturday,

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Sunday six pm to six in the morning. All right,

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So at six oh that's now six oh eight pm.

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If I go back to that time, walking around the hospital.

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It was Sunday evening and my job, I was considered

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noncommissioned officer of the day. I had so many different responsibilities.

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I was responsible for security of the hospital. I had

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all kinds of different things to do. I won't go

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through all all my responsibilities because it would just be boring,

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and I'm not here to tell you, you know, the boring

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stories of the glory days. To quote Bruce Springstein, I'm

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not here to do that. I'm not here to do that.

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But for the sake of this introduction, I think it's

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an important story because of my job. I walked around

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and you know, at the hospital in the evenings, obviously

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everything is basically closed other than your inpatient wards in

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the emergency room, everything else is closed down. Everything. So

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as I'm walking around doing security checks, everything's locked up, everything's,

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you know, fine. I did a walk around the perimeter

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of the base hospital making sure everything is safe there,

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checking cameras, doing a lot of security work is what

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I did. A lot of it was security work. So

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I walked around a lot of times. And this big

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hospital what four stories five stories again, I don't remember

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this huge hospital with basically empty walking around by myself

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on Sunday evenings and time and time again, I would

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I kind of refer to it. And I did a

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lot of talking to myself. Okay, if anyone would have

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walked up on me, like what are you doing? But

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I do like to talk to myself, okay, spending time alone,

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I will, I will do a lot of talking to

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myself and I and I would always kind of reference

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this Sunday night feeling. I would get this Sunday night

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vibe that I would get as the Sunday night blues.

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I don't know why I call that, but a lot

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of times I would get, you know, I just I

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don't know. I would kind of become introspective and just

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kind of think about my life and how things had gone,

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had things gone the way I wanted to, remembering all

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of my mistakes want and there would be a sense

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sometimes maybe a little bit of melancholy depression, discouragement, dissatisfaction

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in life, a little like you know, what where am

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I going? What's going? You know, just a lot of

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questioning of everything, maybe getting a little too philosophical, but

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I would get you can call it I get into

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my fields, get I get into my emotion whatever terminology

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would you you would like to use. So Sunday evenings

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historically I have I have a tendency to do a

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little bit of that. And I was thinking about this today.

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Millions of Christians got up this morning and they went

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to church. They got the family, a lot of them

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have families, get in their car, drive to church, and

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they heard about Jesus. They heard a sermon, they heard

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the word of God. They sang some hymns or praise songs.

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They may have prayed, maybe they partook of the Lord's Supper.

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Whatever they did, they went to church and heard things.

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Right now, it's now Sunday evening. I wonder how many

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Christians right now, if they're even remotely honest with themselves,

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can say, I am fully satisfied in my life. I

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have nothing to hunger and thirst for. I have Jesus.

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I went to church, I heard the word of God.

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I am full, I am perfectly content, I am happy,

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I am satisfied. I have all that I need because

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I have Jesus. Oh, and I wonder how many maybe

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they have some of those same feelings on a Sunday evening,

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maybe some questioning and longing and wanting and needing and desiring.

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I wonder because I know by Monday, even if they

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haven't said anything, their discomptentment, their frustration, their irritations with

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life will probably show up, maybe even by the end

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of this evening. But sometime tomorrow they'll voice their displeasure,

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they'll voice their dissatisfaction. They will do that because that's reality.

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Even though Christians try to teach oh no, no, no

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no no. If you've got Jesus, you've got all you need.

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Jesus is all I need. I'm perfectly happy with him.

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I just don't think reality proves what we claim, what

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we pretend. So and in this series we've been discussing

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satisfaction spiritual satisfaction, and part one I began challenging the

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popular Christian claim that Jesus fully satisfies. I explored how

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this idea is often repeated in sermons, songs, and books,

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but rarely examined honestly. I began to ask some hard

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questions about what satisfaction actually means, and whether most Christians

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who claim it are really just enjoying circumstantial blessing like marriage, friendship,

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financial stability, and emotional support, things that naturally bring satisfaction,

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whether Christ is involved or not. And I keep bringing

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that question up. Are you really satisfied with Jesus? Are

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you just happen to be satisfied because your life is

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pretty good and you can act all spiritual and you

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can act all godly and you can talk about Jesus

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and how fulfilled Christianity makes you. But just like, yeah't

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it interesting that you just have all the things on

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any list about satisfaction. You have this, you have this,

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check check check, check check, but you share act all

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super spiritual and pious. Yeah. I call into question a

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lot of that. And Part two, I think I deepened

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the critique. I think I went a little deeper. I

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looked at how many Christians feel pressured to say they're

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satisfied in Christ even when they're actually not, because dissatisfaction

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is often treated as spiritual failure. I examined the role

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of privilege in this theology, how those who claim spiritual

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satisfaction often have most of Maslow's hierarchy of needs they

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already have all of those needs already in place, and

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how the Church tends to overlook or even shame those

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who are hungry, hurting, or emotionally hello and empty, and

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they all the while will insist Jesus should be enough.

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And it's always interesting those who are without, those who

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have don't have Maslow's hierarchy of needs actually being met.

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They're told Jesus is enough by the people who have

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everything on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. It's total trash the

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way the game is played. So in this episode and

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episode three, Part three, we're gonna kind of slow down.

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We're gonna ask a question what does real satisfaction actually

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require psychologically and theiologically, Because before we can ask whether

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Jesus satisfies, we need to define what satisfaction even is,

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and we've kind of been trying to build on this definition.

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We'll even dig in a little further. If we take

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the actual definition the fulfillment of a need, desire, or appetite,

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reaching the point where you've had enough, then we have

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to ask what does it take as a human being

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to be truly said satisfied. Psychologists have spent decades studying

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this question, and what they found is both incredibly helpful

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and deeply uncomfortable for how we usually talk about satisfaction

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within the Christian world. Because the truth is, unless your

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basic needs, your emotional world, your sense of agency, love,

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and meaning are being addressed. You won't feel satisfied no

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matter how many Bible verses you quote, no matter how

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many church services you go, no matter how many small

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groups you join, and no matter how many worship songs

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you sing. So in this episode, we're going to look

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at what psychology actually says is required for deep, lasting satisfaction.

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Explore how sin is often misdirected attempt or an a

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misdirected attempt to meet legitimate needs in illegitimate ways. I

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think that's key. And then I'm going to ask what

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does the gospel actually promise? Does it promise freedom from need,

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freedom from desire, freedom from want, freedom from frustration, irritation, discourage,

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and depression. Or does it offer a savior who enters

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into our hunger, into this reality and then walks with

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us in it. What does it actually promise? So that's

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what we're going to do. I know this has been

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somewhat controversial. Some people have really appreciated what I'm trying

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to do. We built a lot of the things we've

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done all kind of fitting together, the discussion about fear,

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the discussion about pornography, this all is fitting together now.

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A lot of times I'm foolish, right because I think, ooh,

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look at this. This is pretty clever, this is pretty brilliant.

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This fits this, This connects to this, this connects to this.

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I think I'm giving this really very deep discussion, and

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a lot of times it's met with other people like, well,

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I don't think it's that deep. I don't think it's

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that interesting. I think it's a waste of my time.

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And I hate that you feel that way. But I

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just think there's more here, even if other people people

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don't see it. So are you ready, Let's just dig in.

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Let's just dig in. That's as quickly I had to

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try to offer some kind of review, and that's the

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best way. So I'm just going to imagine I'm walking

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around early Birk West Hospital and well, Belleview, Nebraska is

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not really located in Omaha, Bellview, Nebraska, off at Air

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Force Base Nebraska, all right, off at Air Force Bace.

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It's Sunday night, and I'm having my typical kind of

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existential crisis. Okay, I'm talking to myself about life. And

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just remember, when I'm walking those halls, I was in

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school working on degrees on theology, Bible, biblical studies. I

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don't remember all the degrees. I was working. I was

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attending a Bible institute. I was a full, full, full

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time student. I was involved in three different schools at

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that time, so a lot of that time and that job,

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I was sitting at a desk when I didn't have

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other things to do, and I was working on homework

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is what it was doing. So it's not like I

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wasn't a Christian. I was a believer. I was reading

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the Bible, studying the Bible. I was a student in

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three schools and a full and full time job in

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the military. I was, but I was all in and

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trying to become equipped and you know, understand theology and doctrine.

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But I still had these feelings. Now, I probably would

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have denied it if you would have confronted me, because

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I was at that time, Oh, I'm a Christian and

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Jesus is all enough and that's all I need. I

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would have really given you a pious, pretend, garbage answer.

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But in the in the solitude of an basically empty hospital,

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walking around by myself, and a lot of times especially

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when it would get dark, especially in the in the

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in the summer, I would go all the way up

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to the top of the stairwell, and there was a

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I had the key to the door, and it took

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me out on the roof of the hospital, and I

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would go up there two in the morning, one in

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the morning, just sit up on top of the hospital

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looking at the stars, and then have all kinds of

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deep existential crisis and wonder about life and thinking, you know,

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is it what is it all really mean? At the

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same time, though, if you would have found me later,

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I would have given you all the Christian answers. But

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here we go. Let's take a step back and ask ourselves.

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What is the actual definition of satisfaction. I just alluded

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to it in my introduction. Satisfaction fulfilling a need or

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let me do it, do it this way, fulfilling a need,

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desire or appetite appetite if I can speak correctly, So

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let me do this again. We're off to a great start.

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The actual definition of satisfaction fulfilling a need, desire, or appetite.

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Reaching the point where you've had enough, You've been satisfied,

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you don't need any more. You're satisfied now. If you

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just think about that that this is why we're never

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truly satisfied, because do we ever truly have enough of anything?

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Maybe temporarily, but appetites, desires, wants, needs, longings, they all

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come crashing back in. So if that's the definition, we're

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going with satisfaction, fulfilling a need, appetite, reaching the point

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where you've had enough. If that's the definition, then we

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have to ask what do psychologists say is actually required

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for someone to experience satisfaction in a real, lasting sense.

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So I put together, utilizing artificial intelligence, a synthesis of

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what psychologists and what their research generally has identified as

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core ingredients for real satisfaction. So here's a synthesis of

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what psychologis and psychological research has identified as core ingredients

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for real satisfaction. Now, I know what you're saying, this

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is psychology, I need scripture. I understand. But there is

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something to this that I think a lot of Christians miss. Okay,

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because remember Christians want to handle every issue with just stop,

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just don't do it. Just die to yourself, don't have

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that desire, don't have that need. Replace it with a

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desire and need for Jesus, and you'll be perfectly content.

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It's all law, law, law, law, law, and you can

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do that. But I don't think it's ever going to

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fix the problem because whether we like it or not,

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there's two things about us that that are foundational. Here. One,

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you're a human being, and these needs and these desires,

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these emotional needs, physiological needs, biological needs, they're inside of you.

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You didn't ask them to be there, they're there. And

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I don't think all the Bible verses in the world,

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and all the condemnation in the world, and all the

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fire and brimstone is going to make those desires just

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go away. Christians love to do that. Someone has a desire,

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had just stop it, just stop it. And it's always

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great because you get to tell everyone else to stop

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their desire. But you have your own desires that you

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don't just stop. It's so weird. And then secondly, so

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not only do we have all of these desires, they're

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inside of us. We have a sinful nature and all

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of that's inside of you. This is like key to

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understanding ourselves. So here's the synthesis of psychologists and psychological

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research generally identifying the core ingredients for real satisfaction. Here's

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some of these and we're going to kind of again

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be borrowing. We've already alluded to Maslow's hierarchy of needs.

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This is kind of just breaking it down a little

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bit more so. The first thing you need is basic

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needs must be met. These are the base levels. This

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is the base level of Maslow's hierarchy of needs before

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someone can even think about spiritual or emotional satisfaction. You

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need food, you need water, you need shelter, you need safety,

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you need rest, and you need security. You gotta have those.

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You gotta have food and water just to survive. Right,

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and you already know what happens. Just remove food, just

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miss a meal, two meals. You know what happens, and

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you immediately see the external evidence that you've missed a meal.

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You become grumpy, You become gripy, you become complaining, You

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snap at people, you're frustrated, you get angry. What is

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going on? Oh well, you just haven't eaten and all

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of it. That just shows you. You just take away

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one of these things and boom you get you get

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a reaction. And sometimes the reaction is what sinful because

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you're showing anger, you're showing discontentment, you're complaining, you're grumbling,

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You're you're not showing love to your neighbor as yourself.

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You're not loving your enemy, you're not turning the other cheek,

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you're not responding with a kind word. Why Because you're

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hungry and you're frustrated. These must be in place. Chronic stress, poverty, trauma,

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or instability undermines any sense of satisfaction. If you've got

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something bringing stress, if you're experiencing some form of poverty,

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any kind of trauma, any instability in your life you

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just don't know, there's a lot of instability. This undermines

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any sense of satisfaction. Until you can find stability, these

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things will I mean, I'm sorry, you're never going to

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get satisfaction. You can claim Jesus from you can talk

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about Jesus twenty four to seven. You're never going to

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have true satisfaction because these things are missing. Basically, this

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puts you in survival mode, and once your in survival mode,

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you will struggle to experience satisfaction of any kind. So

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the implication much of what people call spiritual satisfaction is

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inaccessible to those in crises, poverty, or trauma on life,

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that definition is radically redefined. So here's the thing. If

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you claim Jesus is that all that you need, will

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take it to people in these conditions, and I'm sorry.

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You know what you're gonna end up doing. You're gonna

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basically say, well, you don't believe in Jesus, you don't

300
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have enough faith, or you're not saved. No, it's because

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they don't have their best basic needs met, which then

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demonstrates that Jesus clearly isn't enough when you don't have

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your basic needs met. And what happened We see it

304
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in job. Things start being taken away from him. And

305
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what happens. He starts crying out. He's he doesn't even

306
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he wish he was dead, he wish he wasn't ever born.

307
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I mean, he expresses pain and frustration because those things

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are being taken away. He doesn't say, oh, well I

309
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got God, I'm satisfied. Now. He's unhappy, he's angry, he's mad,

310
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he's got questions, he want answers, he wants something to change.

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So basic needs must be met or there's not gonna

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be any saturd faction, and so you can forget spiritual satisfaction.

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So those are basic needs. Second, psychological stability and emotional regulation.

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According to self determination theory and related models, a person

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must have a stable emotional baseline to experience satisfaction. Chronic anxiety,

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depression or unresolved trauma interfere with the ability to feel

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to feel like needs are met even if they are.

318
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And guess what, chronic anxiety depression. Some of these things

319
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are beyond people just say well, just stop feeling bad,

320
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just stop. These are deep rooted issues and they can

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be caused by lots of different things, and just giving

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someone Jesus just doesn't make all of a sudden, oh

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it all fixed, it's all better. Christians like to believe

324
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that it's basically Christians sometimes treat anxiety depression a lot

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of mental health and emotional issues. They treat it in

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a very weird way, right, because you would never go

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to someone like, Oh, I mean, well, maybe some crazy,

328
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whacked out charismatics would do this, but charismatic theology is

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evil and should be you know, removed from the face

330
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of the earth. Okay, so don't even get me started

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on charismatic theology because I don't even acknowledge it as

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being Christianity. But any reasonable person would not go to

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someone who's got terminal cancer, say, get Jesus and your

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cancer goes away. Get Jesus and this disease goes away.

335
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Or hey, you're an amputee, well come to Jesus and

336
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you'll get a new leg. Are you're paralyzed, come to

337
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Jesus and you'll walk again. It doesn't work that way.

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And guess what, just getting Jesus does not take away

339
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your physical illness or physical disability. It doesn't just magically

340
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make you mentally whole and emotionally whole. And therefore, having

341
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Jesus you can tell everyone Jesus is going to make

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all of this better and you're going to be perfectly satisfied.

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But these things, if these things are in place, you're

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not going to have that satisfaction. It's just a reality.

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Distorted beliefs about yourself or the world can block satisfaction

346
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even when external conditions are good. So these are situations

347
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where you can have some psychological instability or some something

348
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messing up your emotions that maybe even be on your control.

349
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And even if you have all of the everything seems

350
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to be perfect and you've got everything good going on

351
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in your life, you're still not going to experience satisfaction.

352
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So people with guilt, shame, or low self worth may

353
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find it impossible to feel satisfied, even spiritually, because their

354
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inner world is fractured. And that's why sometimes there's things happening.

355
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It goes back to something inwardly is not right for

356
00:22:50.279 --> 00:22:56.240
whatever reason, whatever reason, and sometimes those are complex, they

357
00:22:56.319 --> 00:22:58.359
are deep, and they take a lot of time to

358
00:22:58.400 --> 00:23:02.839
try to figure out. So you're not going to have

359
00:23:02.920 --> 00:23:05.440
any true satisfaction if your basic needs are not met

360
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and if there's a lack of psychological stability and emotional regulation.

361
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Number three the fulfillment of core of physio of psychological needs.

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I was going to go physiological. We've already covered physiological

363
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fulfillment of the core psychological needs. Self determination theory identifies

364
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three universal needs for deep satisfaction. These are psychological needs. Autonomy,

365
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the feeling that you have agency, that your actions aligned

366
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with your values and are freely chosen. Everybody wants to

367
00:23:37.240 --> 00:23:40.000
feel some sense of autonomy, that you have some sense

368
00:23:40.000 --> 00:23:41.599
that you can do this or you can do this,

369
00:23:41.680 --> 00:23:45.880
and you're not just being controlled and everything's being made

370
00:23:45.920 --> 00:23:48.759
for you. Everybody wants to feel some sense of autonomy.

371
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There's some sense of that and if you don't have it, well,

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you're wellbeing and sense of satisfaction can be taken away.

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Number two competence feeling that you are capable and effective,

374
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that you're growing or achieving in some way. You want

375
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to feel competent. You want to feel that there's some

376
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level of competence. You want to feel that or if

377
00:24:09.599 --> 00:24:12.920
you don't, then you get frustrated, you get ear. You

378
00:24:12.960 --> 00:24:15.400
see this with a kid right when they're trying to

379
00:24:15.440 --> 00:24:18.000
do their schoolwork. If they can't get it, they don't

380
00:24:18.079 --> 00:24:22.440
understand it. What happens Do they feel satisfied? Oh, they

381
00:24:22.440 --> 00:24:25.880
get very frustrated because they lack that sense of competence.

382
00:24:27.039 --> 00:24:30.279
You get humiliated, you get embarrassed. You're not very satisfied

383
00:24:30.279 --> 00:24:31.839
at that point in time. I don't care how much

384
00:24:31.880 --> 00:24:41.200
you have Jesus. And then so autonomy, competence, I guess

385
00:24:41.200 --> 00:24:47.200
with a third one relatedness or relationship or you want

386
00:24:47.240 --> 00:24:50.279
to feel like people can you can relate to people

387
00:24:50.319 --> 00:24:53.039
and you can be related to all Right, the idea

388
00:24:53.079 --> 00:24:57.000
here is feeling connected to someone, to others. You want

389
00:24:57.039 --> 00:24:58.960
to feel that you belong. You want to feel that

390
00:24:59.000 --> 00:25:02.839
you're actually and that you're actually valued. You don't want

391
00:25:02.839 --> 00:25:04.680
to feel like you're being used. You want to feel

392
00:25:04.680 --> 00:25:06.640
like you're being actually loved. You don't want to feel

393
00:25:06.640 --> 00:25:13.640
like that, You want that you're actually valued. Satisfaction increases

394
00:25:13.640 --> 00:25:17.000
when people feel they're living a meaningful life with choice, impact,

395
00:25:17.039 --> 00:25:21.440
and connection. These are relational, psychological, and functional needs, not

396
00:25:21.599 --> 00:25:25.559
just emotional highs. If any of these are missing, boom,

397
00:25:25.640 --> 00:25:29.839
there goes satisfaction. And again I'm trying to set this up.

398
00:25:30.680 --> 00:25:33.200
These things have to be in place. If they're not

399
00:25:33.319 --> 00:25:37.279
in place, and if they're not present, then guess what

400
00:25:37.960 --> 00:25:42.319
something's going to happen. You're going to be doing, You're

401
00:25:42.319 --> 00:25:47.400
going to be thinking, pursuing, desiring, and doing things that

402
00:25:47.519 --> 00:25:51.200
in many cases will lead you right over into sin.

403
00:25:51.759 --> 00:25:54.000
And we're going to talk about I believe sin in

404
00:25:54.000 --> 00:25:58.319
many cases is simply our attempt to satisfy and to

405
00:25:58.480 --> 00:26:02.319
meet unmet needs. But we're doing so in a way

406
00:26:02.519 --> 00:26:11.119
that Scripture condemns number four. You need some type of

407
00:26:11.160 --> 00:26:15.839
congruence between expectations and reality. Now this one is a

408
00:26:15.880 --> 00:26:23.680
little bit more complicated if your expectations are unrealistically high,

409
00:26:24.759 --> 00:26:27.400
which is often true even and I think some cases,

410
00:26:27.480 --> 00:26:30.160
and I think Christianity makes it worse you will almost

411
00:26:30.200 --> 00:26:34.200
always feel disappointed. We talked about this in a previous episode.

412
00:26:34.240 --> 00:26:36.799
I'm telling you all of these things are interconnected. Look,

413
00:26:36.839 --> 00:26:41.039
I'm saying, if you have any expectation for anything, you're

414
00:26:41.200 --> 00:26:46.839
bound to be a dissatisfied, unsatisfied and frustrated because expectation

415
00:26:47.440 --> 00:26:51.519
is the very thing that will lead you to dissatisfaction. Now, Christianity,

416
00:26:51.759 --> 00:26:54.599
that we sell Christianity in a way that gives you

417
00:26:54.680 --> 00:26:59.359
the highest level of expectation in the world. Because it's

418
00:26:59.359 --> 00:27:02.799
basically so you come to Jesus. Done, dun, dun, dunn,

419
00:27:05.200 --> 00:27:09.839
You're gonna be perfectly satisfied because Jesus it's all you need.

420
00:27:10.039 --> 00:27:13.480
You're never gonna hunger and thirst again. You've got everything.

421
00:27:14.359 --> 00:27:16.480
You don't need to look to anything else. The world

422
00:27:16.519 --> 00:27:19.680
can't satisfy you. Nothing can satisfy you. You have Jesus,

423
00:27:19.960 --> 00:27:23.559
you have purpose, you have meaning, you have an identity.

424
00:27:23.799 --> 00:27:27.119
You've got everything. You should be completely content. Oh and wait,

425
00:27:27.160 --> 00:27:29.960
there's more. Now that you have Jesus, you have the

426
00:27:30.160 --> 00:27:34.039
power of God working through you. You can now say

427
00:27:34.160 --> 00:27:37.799
no to sin, yes to God. You've been said free.

428
00:27:37.920 --> 00:27:40.680
You basically can be perfect. You're a new creature. All

429
00:27:40.759 --> 00:27:42.720
things are passed away, all things have become new. You

430
00:27:42.799 --> 00:27:45.960
basically can do you never have to sin again. And

431
00:27:45.960 --> 00:27:48.160
you're like, WHOA, I got a light when I became

432
00:27:48.200 --> 00:27:49.839
a Christian, and then all of a sudden you get

433
00:27:49.839 --> 00:27:51.640
slapped in the face. Day in and day out. You

434
00:27:51.720 --> 00:27:54.680
keep sinning, You keep sinning, You keep sinning, you keep sinning.

435
00:27:54.799 --> 00:27:57.319
You still have these desires, you still are not happy,

436
00:27:57.400 --> 00:28:00.400
You're still not satisfied. Or to quote again, I've said

437
00:28:00.400 --> 00:28:03.039
this already once in this series, the Youtwo song, I

438
00:28:03.119 --> 00:28:07.039
still haven't found what I'm looking for all of a sudden,

439
00:28:07.240 --> 00:28:10.799
what's wrong with me? Well, what's wrong is you are

440
00:28:10.880 --> 00:28:14.599
sold a bill of goods and your expectations are way

441
00:28:14.680 --> 00:28:25.240
up here and they're unrealistic. Satisfaction happens not just when

442
00:28:25.319 --> 00:28:29.640
needs are met, but when you expect, but when what

443
00:28:29.720 --> 00:28:32.559
you expect and what you experience are in alignment. You've

444
00:28:32.559 --> 00:28:37.359
got to have some alignment here, They've got to be

445
00:28:37.359 --> 00:28:40.880
in agreement. Here's what I expect, here's what I get now.

446
00:28:41.359 --> 00:28:43.759
So right here we could get into a discussion do

447
00:28:43.799 --> 00:28:47.400
we just need to lower our expectations to literally zero?

448
00:28:48.039 --> 00:28:52.200
What are the negative consequences of having no expectations? If

449
00:28:52.200 --> 00:28:56.559
you have no expectations, you will never be disappointed. I

450
00:28:57.319 --> 00:29:01.240
don't think. I don't think that actually works. It sounds good,

451
00:29:01.319 --> 00:29:05.599
but here's the problem. Even if I have no expectation,

452
00:29:06.359 --> 00:29:09.519
I have none. I can, I can. It may help

453
00:29:09.559 --> 00:29:14.200
me some, But here's the reality. These desires, these needs,

454
00:29:14.640 --> 00:29:21.920
these wants are built into our DNA. It's built into

455
00:29:21.960 --> 00:29:27.160
our DNA. Forget even our sinful desires, our sinful nature

456
00:29:27.240 --> 00:29:29.200
and the wants and desires it has. We haven't even

457
00:29:29.240 --> 00:29:31.880
got into that yet. So I think even if I

458
00:29:31.920 --> 00:29:35.480
have no expectation, I'm still gonna feel the pain and

459
00:29:35.200 --> 00:29:37.799
the need and the desire. I may be able to

460
00:29:37.960 --> 00:29:41.599
it'll be a little easier maybe to try to process, well,

461
00:29:41.640 --> 00:29:43.200
I don't get this, and I don't get this, and

462
00:29:43.200 --> 00:29:45.559
I don't have that. Well, I don't have any expectation

463
00:29:45.680 --> 00:29:49.200
to ever have that, So I'm good. Right, Maybe you can,

464
00:29:49.279 --> 00:29:51.400
maybe it will be helpful, But then you're gonna one

465
00:29:51.480 --> 00:29:53.599
day wake up and go, well, why why can't I

466
00:29:53.799 --> 00:29:56.920
have no expectation to have any of this? When I

467
00:29:56.920 --> 00:30:00.680
can look over there and go that person has this, this, this, this, this, this, well,

468
00:30:00.720 --> 00:30:03.160
why do they get all of that? And they can

469
00:30:03.240 --> 00:30:05.920
only can expect it. They get it, but I'm not

470
00:30:06.000 --> 00:30:08.599
even allowed to have the expectation because I'm never going

471
00:30:08.599 --> 00:30:13.279
to have it. Yeah, now that becomes very complicated. Now

472
00:30:13.359 --> 00:30:15.839
Christians will come in. You just need to trust God.

473
00:30:16.759 --> 00:30:19.720
You just need to trust his sovereignty. He doesn't want

474
00:30:19.759 --> 00:30:22.319
you to have it. Now be quiet, because I'm going

475
00:30:22.359 --> 00:30:23.960
to go back to all the things you don't have.

476
00:30:26.079 --> 00:30:29.279
That's again Christianity doesn't sometimes have a good answer for

477
00:30:29.359 --> 00:30:34.279
this number five. So let's go through these. These are

478
00:30:34.319 --> 00:30:39.079
things based off psychological research and psychologists. Here's what they

479
00:30:39.119 --> 00:30:43.079
typically identify are the core ingredients for satisfaction. Basic needs

480
00:30:43.160 --> 00:30:47.519
must be met, Psychological stability and emotional regulation. Fulfillment of

481
00:30:47.559 --> 00:30:53.440
core psychological needs, congruence between expectations and reality, and a

482
00:30:53.680 --> 00:30:58.160
narrative or framework that makes it feel like life is

483
00:30:58.839 --> 00:31:02.079
makes life feel coherent. Let's stay it that way. You

484
00:31:02.119 --> 00:31:05.079
need a narrative, you need a framework that makes life

485
00:31:05.119 --> 00:31:09.400
feel somewhat coherent. Psychological well being is tied to having

486
00:31:09.440 --> 00:31:14.920
a meaning making system. Now, Christianity likes to believe that

487
00:31:14.920 --> 00:31:17.359
we're the only ones who have a meaning making system,

488
00:31:17.559 --> 00:31:22.000
but people can find a coherent philosophy to a place

489
00:31:22.079 --> 00:31:25.359
upon life that gives us some sense of that gives

490
00:31:25.400 --> 00:31:27.920
them a sense of wellbeing because they need to know

491
00:31:28.160 --> 00:31:31.279
that life makes some kind of sense. So people may

492
00:31:31.319 --> 00:31:34.480
turn to Islam, they may turn to Mormonism, Jehovah's witness,

493
00:31:34.640 --> 00:31:38.039
it doesn't matter. They will find some system. Some atheists,

494
00:31:38.039 --> 00:31:40.559
we'll talk about having great well being. All you need

495
00:31:40.680 --> 00:31:43.680
is something that will make it all make sense. And

496
00:31:43.720 --> 00:31:46.119
if it makes sense to you, then that's all you

497
00:31:46.240 --> 00:31:49.319
need to then have some sense and level of satisfaction,

498
00:31:52.039 --> 00:31:54.400
some sense. I don't think that's again. You've got to

499
00:31:54.440 --> 00:31:56.119
have all these things in place. You got to really

500
00:31:56.160 --> 00:31:58.920
have all of these things. People need a story or

501
00:31:58.960 --> 00:32:02.839
a framework that helps them understand their experiences. Even suffering

502
00:32:02.880 --> 00:32:06.400
can be endured if you basically try to convince yourself,

503
00:32:06.640 --> 00:32:11.119
oh there's purpose in this. It's redemptive, and Christians love

504
00:32:11.160 --> 00:32:14.920
to do that. Hey, you were you were molested for

505
00:32:14.960 --> 00:32:17.680
fifteen years. Oh, I got good news for you. It

506
00:32:17.759 --> 00:32:21.160
was for your good. It's all gonna work out to good.

507
00:32:21.599 --> 00:32:24.799
There's redemption in it. God was doing that so that

508
00:32:24.920 --> 00:32:28.000
you'll be better off. I mean sometimes it's the most

509
00:32:28.000 --> 00:32:30.880
twisted and psychologically scarring thing I've ever heard in my life.

510
00:32:31.039 --> 00:32:34.599
But if you can be convinced, oh, I went through

511
00:32:34.599 --> 00:32:36.319
all of this and it was for good. There's a

512
00:32:36.359 --> 00:32:38.440
purpose in it. A lot of it's just you're kept

513
00:32:38.440 --> 00:32:40.920
trying to convince yourself and then maybe it will make

514
00:32:41.000 --> 00:32:47.599
things better. A person who sees pain is meaningful will

515
00:32:47.720 --> 00:32:51.519
report greater satisfaction than someone who sees life as chaotic

516
00:32:51.640 --> 00:32:54.119
or pointless. So that's why people got to feel like, oh,

517
00:32:54.119 --> 00:32:56.880
there's a purpose behind everything. There's a meaning behind everything.

518
00:32:57.480 --> 00:32:59.680
Now again you can say, well, scripture gives these ideas.

519
00:32:59.720 --> 00:33:02.880
I am understand that, but I just want you to

520
00:33:02.880 --> 00:33:05.720
see everyone tries to come up with these concepts because

521
00:33:05.759 --> 00:33:12.839
everyone needs this. This is a psychological need. This is

522
00:33:12.880 --> 00:33:15.680
where religion and philosophy could possibly help or hurt. A

523
00:33:15.720 --> 00:33:19.279
bad theology can destroy satisfaction. Well, if I loved God more,

524
00:33:19.319 --> 00:33:22.640
I wouldn't feel this way. A gospel centered theology can

525
00:33:22.680 --> 00:33:30.400
offer hope despite dissatisfaction. So what is required for real satisfaction? Psychological?

526
00:33:30.960 --> 00:33:35.799
Psychologically satisfaction arises when a person experiences basic survival needs

527
00:33:35.799 --> 00:33:39.400
met emotional stability, a sense of autonomy, competence and connection,

528
00:33:39.960 --> 00:33:44.480
reasonable expectations, and a meaningful framework for life. If even

529
00:33:44.640 --> 00:33:49.200
one or two of these are absent, true satisfaction becomes

530
00:33:49.319 --> 00:33:58.680
elusive even for religious people. No matter how much Bible

531
00:33:58.720 --> 00:34:04.240
you read, how much church you go to, that satisfaction

532
00:34:04.359 --> 00:34:06.079
is going to be gone. You're gonna get discourage, you're

533
00:34:06.079 --> 00:34:08.159
gonna get depressed. You just remove one or two of

534
00:34:08.199 --> 00:34:15.760
these things. From a psychological perspective, real satisfaction includes the

535
00:34:15.800 --> 00:34:19.599
fulfillment of emotional, relational, and even physical needs, not just

536
00:34:19.679 --> 00:34:24.199
intellectual and spiritual ones. When we talk about satisfaction in

537
00:34:24.239 --> 00:34:28.840
any meaningful or lasting way, here's what's typically included. All right,

538
00:34:29.039 --> 00:34:30.599
So now we're going to kind of even double down.

539
00:34:30.599 --> 00:34:32.719
We're going to expand us a little bit more, because

540
00:34:32.719 --> 00:34:34.840
I really want you to see all the things that

541
00:34:34.920 --> 00:34:38.159
seem to be required for it to occur. Christianity is

542
00:34:38.199 --> 00:34:41.800
just like get Jesus, and it's usually get Jesus, believe

543
00:34:41.840 --> 00:34:44.360
in him, trust in him, die to yourself, and you're

544
00:34:44.400 --> 00:34:46.159
and you're good to go. You're good to go, and

545
00:34:46.440 --> 00:34:48.960
everything should be good again. The people who preach that,

546
00:34:49.760 --> 00:34:52.639
in most cases have many of these needs met, which

547
00:34:52.679 --> 00:34:56.519
then it's so irritating, right because is it Jesus or

548
00:34:56.559 --> 00:34:59.199
is it just because you have your needs met? But again,

549
00:34:59.360 --> 00:35:04.679
here's something emotional needs. People need to be to feel seen.

550
00:35:05.039 --> 00:35:07.719
They need to feel heard, and they need to feel understood.

551
00:35:07.960 --> 00:35:10.519
If you don't feel like people see you, if you

552
00:35:10.519 --> 00:35:12.840
don't feel like people hear you, and if you don't

553
00:35:12.840 --> 00:35:17.760
feel like people understand you, the wills are coming off

554
00:35:17.840 --> 00:35:21.800
the satisfaction train. Are the are the you know, the

555
00:35:21.800 --> 00:35:24.000
wills are coming off the truck, coming off the car.

556
00:35:24.039 --> 00:35:28.480
It's just coming off. You need to experience emotional safety

557
00:35:28.519 --> 00:35:30.639
and validation. You want to be validated. You want to

558
00:35:30.639 --> 00:35:31.760
be seen, you want to be heard, you want to

559
00:35:31.800 --> 00:35:34.280
be understood. You have to be able to express and

560
00:35:34.320 --> 00:35:36.840
process emotions without fear of rejection or judgment. You want

561
00:35:36.880 --> 00:35:38.119
to be able to You got to be in a

562
00:35:38.119 --> 00:35:41.199
situation where you can express your emotions, express your fear,

563
00:35:41.400 --> 00:35:44.280
express your anger, express your frustration, and people are not

564
00:35:44.320 --> 00:35:47.199
going to go well, that's not very Christian of you.

565
00:35:47.639 --> 00:35:51.000
All right, okay, but you've got to have this. If

566
00:35:51.039 --> 00:35:56.280
you have it, then this is a good step to satisfaction. Satisfaction.

567
00:35:56.760 --> 00:35:59.960
If emotional needs go unmet, even someone with food shall

568
00:36:00.320 --> 00:36:03.880
and a job can feel empty, anxious, or unfulfilled. Emotional

569
00:36:03.960 --> 00:36:10.599
deprivation leads to dissatisfaction, even spiritual dissatisfaction. If you're deprived

570
00:36:10.920 --> 00:36:16.199
of some of these basic emotional things, not going to

571
00:36:16.239 --> 00:36:21.599
go well another one and again, when these emotional needs

572
00:36:21.599 --> 00:36:24.360
are not being met, I'm telling you it's going to

573
00:36:24.400 --> 00:36:28.559
have an impact on every area of your life. And remember,

574
00:36:28.920 --> 00:36:31.360
these needs are built inside of you. You didn't ask

575
00:36:31.400 --> 00:36:33.760
for these needs to be put there. Now you can

576
00:36:33.800 --> 00:36:36.840
try to say I have no expectation that any of

577
00:36:36.840 --> 00:36:39.880
my emotional needs will ever be met. You can pull

578
00:36:39.920 --> 00:36:42.440
that off, but those needs are still there. And then

579
00:36:42.440 --> 00:36:45.800
you take the need, mix it with your sinful nature. Boom.

580
00:36:45.880 --> 00:36:53.360
You see where things are going. Intimacy and connection. Psychological

581
00:36:53.400 --> 00:36:59.880
satisfaction requires intimacy, not just physical, but emotional and relational closeness.

582
00:37:00.079 --> 00:37:04.960
This includes vulnerability, mutual trust, empathy, and feeling truly known

583
00:37:05.000 --> 00:37:08.719
and accepted by another person. Loneliness is one of the

584
00:37:08.760 --> 00:37:16.400
greatest predictors of dissatisfaction and depression. Loneliness is one of

585
00:37:16.400 --> 00:37:21.199
the greatest predictors of dissatisfaction and depression, the greatest. Now,

586
00:37:21.239 --> 00:37:25.039
I have a number of articles right now about say

587
00:37:25.199 --> 00:37:29.840
call it the loneliest loneliness epidemic in society. This has

588
00:37:29.880 --> 00:37:37.599
been talked about everywhere. But if someone becomes isolated and alone,

589
00:37:37.880 --> 00:37:40.480
you said, but you've got Jesus, and Christians will say

590
00:37:40.480 --> 00:37:43.760
that you should never feel alone. Jesus is with you,

591
00:37:44.800 --> 00:37:47.480
so they'll talk to someone who's alone, Well, you just

592
00:37:48.039 --> 00:37:51.760
remember you have Jesus with you, so everything will be good. Now,

593
00:37:52.199 --> 00:37:54.559
all right, I'm going to go go back and get

594
00:37:54.599 --> 00:37:57.159
in the in bed with my husband or my wife,

595
00:37:57.239 --> 00:37:59.159
and I'm going to go back with my family, and

596
00:37:59.639 --> 00:38:03.199
you have good night. Okay, Everything's wonderful for you, right,

597
00:38:03.440 --> 00:38:08.760
and because you've got Jesus. Again. Christians love this game

598
00:38:09.199 --> 00:38:12.559
where you tell people who don't have they've got Jesus

599
00:38:13.559 --> 00:38:17.119
and that Jesus is enough, while they have the very

600
00:38:17.119 --> 00:38:21.440
thing that the other person is supposed to just have, Jesus.

601
00:38:21.159 --> 00:38:30.920
It's very contradictory. Satisfaction is not just about being loving.

602
00:38:31.239 --> 00:38:33.920
It's about being loved and being safe in that love.

603
00:38:35.280 --> 00:38:38.199
So you have intimacy and connection. A third physical pleasure

604
00:38:38.239 --> 00:38:44.400
and sensory fulfillment. This includes touch, physical satisfaction. I won't

605
00:38:44.400 --> 00:38:51.960
get graphic our physical satisfaction, warmth, taste, beauty, movement. Basic

606
00:38:52.199 --> 00:38:57.440
embodied experiences. These are basic body embodied experiences they're built

607
00:38:57.519 --> 00:39:01.920
inside of us. Well, this is downplayed and religious settings.

608
00:39:02.199 --> 00:39:05.239
Psychology see sensory and physical pleasure as deeply tied to

609
00:39:05.280 --> 00:39:10.280
overall satisfaction. Physical affection can dramatically affect emotional stability and

610
00:39:10.320 --> 00:39:16.079
satisfaction levels. Denying or repressing physical pleasure doesn't enhance satisfaction,

611
00:39:16.360 --> 00:39:20.480
It typically blocks it. Now, guess what you're missing? Any

612
00:39:20.519 --> 00:39:23.320
of these things you see? You see where this goes?

613
00:39:23.519 --> 00:39:29.480
You take? These are needs built inside, they're psychological, physiological, biological,

614
00:39:29.800 --> 00:39:33.599
they're inside. Now you mix it with your sinful nature.

615
00:39:34.239 --> 00:39:37.960
One doesn't h oh, we can see where this is going.

616
00:39:40.280 --> 00:39:44.679
Another is love, Giving and receiving. Love is essential to

617
00:39:44.719 --> 00:39:46.920
any real sense of satisfaction, not just the feeling of

618
00:39:46.960 --> 00:39:51.840
loving others, but being securely loved, unconditionally and consistently. Especially

619
00:39:51.880 --> 00:39:55.719
important is secure attachment, a stable sense that someone is

620
00:39:55.760 --> 00:40:01.199
for you even when you mess up. Next, derogation of body, mind,

621
00:40:01.239 --> 00:40:05.800
and soul. Modern psychology increasingly recognizes that true satisfaction must

622
00:40:05.800 --> 00:40:10.199
address the whole person. The body needs and pleasure, the mind,

623
00:40:10.519 --> 00:40:14.239
meaning and purpose, the emotions, connection and stability, and the

624
00:40:14.239 --> 00:40:19.400
spirit transcendence, hope, and a moral framework. You can't just

625
00:40:19.480 --> 00:40:24.400
meet one of those areas and expect lasting satisfaction. So

626
00:40:24.559 --> 00:40:31.239
psychological satisfaction requires emotional intimacy and validation, relational love and belonging,

627
00:40:31.840 --> 00:40:37.760
physical pleasure and safety, purpose, agency, and coherence, a loving

628
00:40:38.280 --> 00:40:42.400
narrative in which the self is seen safe and valued.

629
00:40:43.199 --> 00:40:53.320
And here's the kicker. Most people Christians included, don't experience

630
00:40:53.360 --> 00:40:58.079
all of this, So even when they claim spiritual satisfaction,

631
00:40:58.800 --> 00:41:05.760
there may be a lot of pretending saying, well, you know,

632
00:41:05.800 --> 00:41:07.880
I'm gonna I'm gonna put this over here and I'm

633
00:41:07.920 --> 00:41:13.679
not gonna think about it because you got to hide

634
00:41:13.719 --> 00:41:25.679
it under the surface. So that sets the stage now

635
00:41:28.519 --> 00:41:30.920
and again you could I told you to put Maslow's

636
00:41:31.000 --> 00:41:33.880
hierarchy of needs. We basically went through Maslow's hierarchy of

637
00:41:33.920 --> 00:41:37.159
needs like three or four different ways. Basically what I've done,

638
00:41:37.239 --> 00:41:40.199
I'm driving the point home. You got to have these

639
00:41:40.199 --> 00:41:44.199
things and if you don't, boom, now you're there's a

640
00:41:44.280 --> 00:41:47.960
lack of satisfaction Christianity. Again. The only answer Christianity really

641
00:41:48.000 --> 00:41:50.559
has is just have Jesus and you got everything. But

642
00:41:50.719 --> 00:41:53.559
usually it's you've got you have Jesus and you have everything,

643
00:41:53.719 --> 00:41:56.599
But then it's that's never enough. No, no, not though

644
00:41:56.719 --> 00:41:58.840
you just have Jesus. Well, wait a minute, how much

645
00:41:58.840 --> 00:42:00.880
are you praying? How much are you reading? How much

646
00:42:00.880 --> 00:42:02.880
you're going to church? Are you part of a small group?

647
00:42:03.239 --> 00:42:05.079
And then all of a sudden, there's like fifteen other

648
00:42:05.159 --> 00:42:13.880
things you have to do. So but here's the thing.

649
00:42:14.280 --> 00:42:16.960
You take all of that. Now what happens if you

650
00:42:17.039 --> 00:42:19.920
remove these things? You start removing I mean I went

651
00:42:19.960 --> 00:42:22.519
through all of them like fifteen different ways. I'm driving

652
00:42:22.519 --> 00:42:24.679
the part. Now just remove two or three of them.

653
00:42:25.559 --> 00:42:34.400
Now what happens? Two things happen. Are you ready? Dissatisfaction sin?

654
00:42:37.320 --> 00:42:47.559
Dissatisfaction sin Philologically and psychologically speaking, sin is us seeking

655
00:42:47.599 --> 00:42:52.159
to fulfill one of those deep rooted desires that plays

656
00:42:52.159 --> 00:42:54.559
a part and being satisfied, but in a way that

657
00:42:54.599 --> 00:43:00.719
goes against God's word. I want you to consider sin

658
00:43:00.760 --> 00:43:06.960
as a disordered satisfaction seeking. Sin is simply a disordered

659
00:43:07.039 --> 00:43:11.320
satisfaction seeking. Or we could say sin is simply seeking

660
00:43:12.119 --> 00:43:16.079
to fix your satisfaction. It's a disordered way to fix

661
00:43:16.119 --> 00:43:22.000
your satisfaction. Sin is you seeking to satisfy your dissatisfaction

662
00:43:22.239 --> 00:43:26.760
in a disordered way. Now that takes sin in a

663
00:43:26.800 --> 00:43:29.920
whole different level and a whole different way that goes

664
00:43:29.960 --> 00:43:32.760
beyond everything. And that's why just saying stop doing it,

665
00:43:32.800 --> 00:43:34.719
don't do it, don't do it. No, no, no, you're

666
00:43:34.760 --> 00:43:40.280
going to deep rooted deeds and desires. It's gonna be

667
00:43:40.360 --> 00:43:43.400
something more complicated. And we're not even again, we've not

668
00:43:43.480 --> 00:43:47.079
even added too much into this equation. The sinful nature,

669
00:43:47.119 --> 00:43:52.360
the sinful nature, the sinful nature, the sinful nature. Sin

670
00:43:52.480 --> 00:43:56.159
is not just the breaking of rules. It's seeking to

671
00:43:56.239 --> 00:43:59.719
fulfill a legitimate need or desire in a way that

672
00:44:00.119 --> 00:44:04.440
bells against God's design, will or word. This is not

673
00:44:04.559 --> 00:44:07.239
a new idea, goes all the way back to Augustine.

674
00:44:07.280 --> 00:44:09.440
It goes back to Aquinas, it goes all the way

675
00:44:09.480 --> 00:44:12.960
back to the Reformers in some different form, and all

676
00:44:13.199 --> 00:44:19.079
this all lines with modern psychological understanding. I'm not we're

677
00:44:19.159 --> 00:44:22.480
throwing out Christianity for psychology. I will say the early

678
00:44:22.599 --> 00:44:27.719
Christian fathers and leaders, many of them understood these concepts.

679
00:44:27.800 --> 00:44:34.400
Going back to Augustine, the Reformers, and Aquinas. Sin is

680
00:44:34.519 --> 00:44:39.320
in many cases simply a misdirection of a real God

681
00:44:39.440 --> 00:44:42.400
given longing. And I'm gonna say god given longing because

682
00:44:42.519 --> 00:44:45.000
we're built with this body and it's built into us.

683
00:44:45.119 --> 00:44:49.199
And again we have the god given longing, a real desire,

684
00:44:49.320 --> 00:44:53.519
need want, You need it to be even remotely satisfied.

685
00:44:53.800 --> 00:44:56.039
Yet you have a sinful nature that's going to corrupt

686
00:44:56.079 --> 00:45:00.880
the desire already. So even if it's the desire is good, well,

687
00:45:00.920 --> 00:45:04.519
we're we are already corrupted. So then our desires are

688
00:45:04.519 --> 00:45:07.320
a mixture of good desires and wrong desires, and it

689
00:45:07.360 --> 00:45:10.199
all gets mixed together, and then your sinful nature is

690
00:45:10.199 --> 00:45:21.079
going to say, we'll satisfy that desire by any means possible. See, desires,

691
00:45:21.119 --> 00:45:24.480
in many cases reflects how we made, how we were made.

692
00:45:25.440 --> 00:45:29.320
Obviously we were made with a need for love. Obviously

693
00:45:29.360 --> 00:45:31.360
we were made with some kind of a desire built

694
00:45:31.360 --> 00:45:33.599
into us for pleasure. I mean, there's no way to

695
00:45:33.599 --> 00:45:36.079
get around that. We like to be pleased in a

696
00:45:36.199 --> 00:45:40.440
hundred different ways. Obviously we have some desire for purpose

697
00:45:40.480 --> 00:45:44.800
and meaning. Obviously we have some hunger and desire for

698
00:45:44.960 --> 00:45:50.719
belonging and intimacy. Obviously we have some craving for security

699
00:45:50.719 --> 00:45:55.760
and peace. Obviously we have some instinct for agency and identity.

700
00:45:56.679 --> 00:45:59.920
None of those desires are inherently sinful, but sin enter

701
00:46:00.079 --> 00:46:02.559
when we attempt to satisfy them in ways that defy

702
00:46:02.679 --> 00:46:05.480
what God, defy the God who gave them. And this

703
00:46:05.519 --> 00:46:09.519
can get very confusing within even within Christian theology, because

704
00:46:09.519 --> 00:46:13.679
wait a minute, God gives me these desires, but then says, no, no, no, no,

705
00:46:13.679 --> 00:46:16.559
no no no no no no no no no no

706
00:46:16.559 --> 00:46:19.360
no no no. You can't satisfy it this way, this way,

707
00:46:19.400 --> 00:46:21.079
this way, this way, this way, this way, this way,

708
00:46:21.079 --> 00:46:23.000
this way, this way. You can't even desire, you can't

709
00:46:23.039 --> 00:46:25.320
lust for it. No no, no, no, no, no no no, don't.

710
00:46:27.239 --> 00:46:29.760
Now that sounds good because many Christians, well, that's right,

711
00:46:29.800 --> 00:46:31.559
you should not lust and desire for any of those

712
00:46:31.559 --> 00:46:34.119
things because you should just love God supremely. Well, we're

713
00:46:34.119 --> 00:46:37.039
never going to love God supremely. And again, it's always

714
00:46:37.119 --> 00:46:40.800
easy for people to say that if they're getting many

715
00:46:40.840 --> 00:46:44.199
of these needs met. See, you can talk a big

716
00:46:44.239 --> 00:46:46.639
spiritual game and you can act like you're such a

717
00:46:46.679 --> 00:46:50.320
spiritual superstar when you're getting all the needs met. Remove

718
00:46:50.400 --> 00:46:53.039
those needs, and now talk to me, you'll sound like job.

719
00:47:03.679 --> 00:47:05.719
Let me let me show you how this plays out.

720
00:47:06.280 --> 00:47:11.119
Let's start with a desire for intimacy. What's the sinful substitution?

721
00:47:12.559 --> 00:47:17.119
Come on, what's the sinful substitution for a desire for intimacy.

722
00:47:17.159 --> 00:47:24.280
Come on, come on, come on, oh illicit sex, pornography,

723
00:47:24.519 --> 00:47:32.960
and codependency. The biblical counter is, well, God's love, be

724
00:47:33.079 --> 00:47:38.000
vulnerable with God. Find intimacy with God. Now again, it's

725
00:47:38.079 --> 00:47:42.800
usually the people who have intimacy. They experience intimacy, they

726
00:47:42.800 --> 00:47:44.480
have it. How they say, but you go find your

727
00:47:44.519 --> 00:47:47.719
intimacy with God. I'm gonna get my intimacy from God

728
00:47:48.079 --> 00:47:51.800
and the physical and emotional intimacy from a person. Well,

729
00:47:51.840 --> 00:47:59.480
how wow, you're a Christian. You're a Christian rock star. Whoa.

730
00:48:00.519 --> 00:48:04.079
And again this plays out so many times in the

731
00:48:04.119 --> 00:48:07.519
way it works in Christianity. They always talk about what happens. Well,

732
00:48:07.559 --> 00:48:09.960
these kids are raised in the church and then they're

733
00:48:10.000 --> 00:48:13.039
about this age, they disappear. And so we always say, well, man,

734
00:48:13.199 --> 00:48:17.079
it's because of liberal professors. It's because of Netflix, it's

735
00:48:17.119 --> 00:48:20.119
because of TikTok, it's because of rock and roll, it's

736
00:48:20.119 --> 00:48:25.920
because of rap. It's because or they have deep desires

737
00:48:26.119 --> 00:48:29.400
for what Christianni says. You can't have those desires, you

738
00:48:29.440 --> 00:48:33.039
cannot meet those desires, do not fulfill those desires, deny

739
00:48:33.159 --> 00:48:36.519
those desires, don't have those desires. So then what do

740
00:48:36.599 --> 00:48:38.679
they do. They're like, okay, well, Christianity's going to be

741
00:48:38.679 --> 00:48:40.039
all up in my case, going to get all up

742
00:48:40.039 --> 00:48:42.320
in my face. I'm going to go meet these desires.

743
00:48:42.360 --> 00:48:46.079
And then ultimately the situation works out. Boom, they get married,

744
00:48:46.280 --> 00:48:49.639
they have kids, Now they have the intimacy they so desire.

745
00:48:49.760 --> 00:48:51.639
Then they come running back into the church and now

746
00:48:51.639 --> 00:48:55.480
they're the young couple sitting in the front room, front row,

747
00:48:55.719 --> 00:48:59.440
condemning everyone and acting so godly and spiritual. I don't

748
00:48:59.440 --> 00:49:02.599
know what the problem is with everyone, because fifteen minutes

749
00:49:02.639 --> 00:49:05.000
ago you had the same problem. But now that you're

750
00:49:05.000 --> 00:49:06.880
married and you're back in the church, you think you're

751
00:49:06.880 --> 00:49:18.920
godly and you can condemn everybody. It's such a game belonging,

752
00:49:19.920 --> 00:49:26.440
sinful substitution. This turns into tribalism, peer pleasing cults. You

753
00:49:26.480 --> 00:49:29.800
want to belong so you got your team. This shows

754
00:49:29.840 --> 00:49:32.639
up in theology even in a sinful way. My tribe

755
00:49:32.639 --> 00:49:37.400
against your tribe. Politics. Oh, you give into peer pressure.

756
00:49:38.440 --> 00:49:40.840
Now the biblical count are supposed to be no, no, no, no.

757
00:49:40.880 --> 00:49:43.280
You don't need to worry about belonging to that peer group.

758
00:49:43.400 --> 00:49:45.199
You don't need to worry about what your friends say,

759
00:49:45.360 --> 00:49:48.760
you know, because you've been adopted into God's family, you're

760
00:49:48.800 --> 00:49:51.880
a child of God. You don't need to worry about

761
00:49:52.000 --> 00:49:56.039
anybody else. Now, guess what typically happens. It's the adults

762
00:49:56.079 --> 00:49:59.679
sitting in the pew. Right, they're out of high school,

763
00:50:00.119 --> 00:50:03.039
out of all of that peer pressure. Whether they've got

764
00:50:03.039 --> 00:50:05.760
their wife, they've got their spouse, so they are already

765
00:50:05.760 --> 00:50:08.480
what they feel like, they already belong, they've got that,

766
00:50:08.639 --> 00:50:11.000
they've got their church, they feel like they fit in.

767
00:50:11.159 --> 00:50:13.119
And they're like, I don't know what these kids always

768
00:50:13.119 --> 00:50:17.000
giving into peer pressure? What is their problem? Yeah, once again,

769
00:50:17.199 --> 00:50:23.360
you talk a big game because you're not there. But

770
00:50:23.519 --> 00:50:26.000
many of those same Christians will still show the tribalism

771
00:50:26.320 --> 00:50:29.039
and that they're getting their identity from something other than God.

772
00:50:29.159 --> 00:50:31.239
But they'll talk a big game and still throw in God.

773
00:50:33.400 --> 00:50:37.159
How about peace? Well, the sinful way is you kind

774
00:50:37.159 --> 00:50:39.639
of just you get numb. You just you kind of

775
00:50:39.719 --> 00:50:44.000
just become comfortably numb to quote Pink Floyd, right, or

776
00:50:44.039 --> 00:50:47.559
you become you turned to substances and drugs and you

777
00:50:47.639 --> 00:50:50.280
look for something they give you some sense of peace.

778
00:50:50.400 --> 00:50:56.559
You look for a substitute. Christianity says trust in God's providence.

779
00:50:58.159 --> 00:51:00.559
You can have perfect peace, just trust in God's providence.

780
00:51:00.880 --> 00:51:03.440
Many Christians try to trust in God's providence. Again, it

781
00:51:03.519 --> 00:51:08.519
sounds good until I don't know. Your family's dead, you're alone, isolated,

782
00:51:08.800 --> 00:51:11.960
you're in a you don't have this, you don't have that.

783
00:51:13.480 --> 00:51:15.639
This has gone wrong, This is going wrong. You don't

784
00:51:15.639 --> 00:51:18.440
know about this. All of a sudden, everybody tells you

785
00:51:18.480 --> 00:51:20.880
to trust in God. And then what happens. You see

786
00:51:20.880 --> 00:51:24.280
the cracks and many Christians their lives, they're struggling. This

787
00:51:24.360 --> 00:51:33.400
happens pleasure, that's a desire. How does it show up sinfully?

788
00:51:33.519 --> 00:51:42.079
In gluttony and lust and escapism more entertainment than anything else. Now,

789
00:51:42.159 --> 00:51:45.679
Christianity will say you can enjoy things, but within God's boundaries.

790
00:51:45.760 --> 00:51:48.000
But then nobody can really agree on what God's boundaries are.

791
00:51:48.000 --> 00:51:49.920
Can I watch this? Can I listen to that? Okay,

792
00:51:50.320 --> 00:51:55.039
so Christianity sometimes it just becomes a convoluted mass. Now

793
00:51:55.039 --> 00:51:57.360
what some people say is, well, you should find your

794
00:51:57.480 --> 00:52:03.639
joy in God. The word of God should bring joy,

795
00:52:04.320 --> 00:52:07.880
Praising him should bring joy. Also that preaches good. But

796
00:52:08.199 --> 00:52:10.159
all the people who say that listen to it in

797
00:52:10.239 --> 00:52:12.119
church say amen, Then get home and go home and

798
00:52:12.280 --> 00:52:14.880
do all the things that brings them pleasure and entertainment,

799
00:52:15.039 --> 00:52:19.280
from sports to movies, to TV shows to family friends,

800
00:52:19.400 --> 00:52:24.639
board games, cooking out, hikes, exercise, long walks on the beach.

801
00:52:24.920 --> 00:52:34.199
Whatever identity, what's the sinful substitution? Pride, performance, rebellion, none,

802
00:52:34.400 --> 00:52:37.519
You just look for something to find your identity. Christianity says,

803
00:52:37.519 --> 00:52:45.239
your identity is in Christ. The power of agency. This

804
00:52:45.360 --> 00:52:48.360
is a desire. You want to feel that you have agency.

805
00:52:48.559 --> 00:52:51.079
This can and sinful substitution. It can show up in

806
00:52:51.239 --> 00:52:56.480
and manipulate, manipulating people, It can and trying to control situations.

807
00:52:58.840 --> 00:53:07.800
Biblical counter is stewardship, humility, surrender. Actually it goes completely

808
00:53:07.840 --> 00:53:14.360
against it. So sin is often not the desire itself.

809
00:53:14.559 --> 00:53:17.519
It's the direction of that desire towards something that becomes

810
00:53:17.559 --> 00:53:23.800
an idle or false savior. Now I'll stop right there.

811
00:53:27.920 --> 00:53:31.480
So we have Maslow's hierarchy of needs, all these things

812
00:53:31.480 --> 00:53:34.960
that we need to be satisfied. Christianity says Jesus satisfies

813
00:53:35.000 --> 00:53:37.280
all of those things. But we know in reality it doesn't.

814
00:53:37.280 --> 00:53:40.559
Because Christians have these same desires. What we need to

815
00:53:40.599 --> 00:53:48.199
realize is then when these desires are not met, it

816
00:53:48.280 --> 00:53:51.679
leads to sin, It leads to issues and our desires

817
00:53:51.719 --> 00:53:54.159
and our thinking and our wants. Now, what is the

818
00:53:54.239 --> 00:53:57.119
Christian solution? Well, on one hand, I would love to

819
00:53:57.159 --> 00:53:59.679
preach the Christian solution right and say, well, you just

820
00:53:59.760 --> 00:54:02.639
need Jesus and Jesus needs to be what you desire.

821
00:54:02.880 --> 00:54:06.000
But again it's such a game because everyone will say

822
00:54:06.039 --> 00:54:09.320
amen to that while they have half the ninety nine

823
00:54:09.320 --> 00:54:11.840
percent of what's on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. If you

824
00:54:11.920 --> 00:54:14.280
got eighty ninety percent of it met, well you can

825
00:54:14.320 --> 00:54:16.519
say all day Jesus is all you need. But it's not.

826
00:54:16.639 --> 00:54:19.599
Jesus is the reason you're satisfied. You're satisfied because you

827
00:54:19.679 --> 00:54:22.360
have everything on the list. So then you can't even

828
00:54:22.400 --> 00:54:24.960
claim Jesus is doing it. So the key is when

829
00:54:24.960 --> 00:54:28.280
you remove everything, would Jesus be enough? Would he really

830
00:54:28.320 --> 00:54:31.639
be enough? If you didn't have any of these things,

831
00:54:32.519 --> 00:54:40.480
where would you be? But it also can explain sin

832
00:54:40.800 --> 00:54:43.519
and a much deeper level. And you know what, it

833
00:54:43.840 --> 00:54:52.159
shows a simple law based approach. Stop doing it, stop

834
00:54:52.159 --> 00:54:55.239
desiring it, stop wanting it. Well, the desires are built

835
00:54:55.239 --> 00:54:59.199
into me. We'll just stop it. Now we could get

836
00:54:59.199 --> 00:55:02.760
into the answer of of just Christianity about dying to self?

837
00:55:03.000 --> 00:55:05.039
What does that mean? How far do we take this

838
00:55:05.119 --> 00:55:08.639
idea take up your cross, deny yourselfe die to yourself.

839
00:55:08.679 --> 00:55:11.159
Do we take that and expand it to every area

840
00:55:11.400 --> 00:55:14.440
or does it have a law gospel approach that maybe

841
00:55:14.480 --> 00:55:17.480
we haven't even considered on this podcast. We will have

842
00:55:17.559 --> 00:55:20.519
to get into that. But again, why is it that

843
00:55:20.880 --> 00:55:24.320
these people one group, they have to deny themselves from

844
00:55:24.360 --> 00:55:27.199
all of these needs that's on the Maslow's hierarchy of

845
00:55:27.280 --> 00:55:29.920
needs in order for them not to be sinful? But

846
00:55:30.320 --> 00:55:33.840
that person can get all everything on Maslow's hierarchy of

847
00:55:33.880 --> 00:55:41.800
needs and get God. Well, where do they deny themselves?

848
00:55:46.639 --> 00:55:52.039
So it's like that's where things get really all messed

849
00:55:52.119 --> 00:55:54.480
up within Christianity. But I'll stop right there. I want

850
00:55:54.519 --> 00:56:01.079
to get into Romans one and disordered desires. I wanted

851
00:56:01.360 --> 00:56:06.880
to get into Uh yeah, well, I'll just stop right there.

852
00:56:07.000 --> 00:56:10.199
I'll stop right there. But now you kind of see

853
00:56:10.239 --> 00:56:14.199
what I've been building towards and all of this and

854
00:56:14.199 --> 00:56:19.400
how this fits again with the whole subject of the

855
00:56:19.480 --> 00:56:24.239
whole Christianity and pornography. Christianity never addresses this deeper issue here,

856
00:56:25.519 --> 00:56:29.679
all right, I'll stop there. Thanks for listening. That was

857
00:56:29.719 --> 00:56:33.559
a lot of information, but there we go. Thanks for listening. Everyone,

858
00:56:33.559 --> 00:56:34.679
have a great evening. God bless